Do Better December 31st 2014 Well Here We Are

31 Dec

No recording of this installment. I’ll be back next week for the regularly scheduled radio broadcast on Thursday at 11am eastern time.

Thirty one days ago I set out to live December better than I had before. At first, I thought this month would be about pushing forward and accomplishing all of the things I had been unable to accomplish in previous years. I thought that working with others who had struggled would help me be the person who accomplished it all like so many others seem to do. That was not what happened.

As I went through the month, I began to think more about how I wanted the season to feel than I wanted it to look. I began to focus on being instead of doing. I began to slow down instead of speeding up, and the results were fascinating. I lost so much of the stress of the season and just rolled with how life went. There is much that usually gets baked and cooked that didn’t. There are gifts that weren’t given. There are cards that didn’t get sent, and the best part is that I feel no guilt over any of it. As far as I know, no one hates me for any of that. If they do, they haven’t told me. I had one of my most stress free holiday seasons ever, and it felt so good.

To those who struggled with the season, I extend my love to you. I have been there. I pray that your next holiday season is better than any you’ve ever experienced. Maybe because I’m at an age where I know that I have fewer holiday seasons to experience than I have already experienced, I look at them differently. I feel that way about the end and beginning of each year as well. My father was 54 years and 23 days old when he passed from this world. I’m 51, and although I intend to be here much longer than my father, it gives one pause. For me, it helps me decide who I truly want to be. I want to be kind. I want to be loving. I want to live authentically and truthfully, and I get better at that every year. I don’t say that to brag. I say that to encourage everyone to follow their truth and authenticity. I know my life isn’t for anyone. It’s my life, and I love it, and I want everyone to love their life as much as I love mine.

I love being a mother, and I know that isn’t the case with others. Some choose not to have children, and some choose to love children birthed by others. I love and adore the man I am married to and cannot think of anyone I would rather spend time with than him. I know most women would go mad spending the amount of time with their husbands that I spend with mine. I love writing and blogging and broadcasting my radio show, even though I’m not where I want to be in that career yet. My life is not free of worry or challenge, but in the grand scheme of life, it’s pretty frickin’ awesome. I don’t know if anyone else would think so if they lived my life, but I do and that’s what’s most important.

The upcoming year is full of promise to make something good even better for me. Maybe your life is great like mine and needs a bit of tweaking. Maybe your life needs a complete overhaul. Maybe you’re somewhere in between. Whatever your situation, I hope you end 2014 well and live 2015 even better.

Many years ago, I made a decision. I decided that because I have two family members who have medical conditions that could take their lives any day, I would live each day as if it were my last one with each of my family members. I do my best every day to send them off with loving words even if the morning has been a struggle. With school shootings and possible car accidents, I hope every family does the same. It is one of the ways I have learned to live without regret. I get up every morning and make my children breakfast. I tell them I love them when they leave the house. I tell my husband the same thing without the breakfast since he doesn’t eat that meal most days. If anyone in my family doesn’t see me again, I want the last words they ever hear from me to be that I love them. It may seem stupid to some, but I’ve seen what regret about the last words someone has spoken to a loved one can do. I’ve seen people agonize for years over an argument or resentment. I don’t want that, so I do what I can to keep it from happening.

Another thing that informs the way I live is to begin with the end in mind. I heard that when my children were small and it made so much sense to me. I would like to think that I’ve raised them from the beginning to become men of character. I do my best to live that way for myself too. I have realized that I do not have to make a huge societal splash to make a difference in this world. By raising young men of character and being a woman of character, I positively affect the planet every day. Am I successful at that every day? That’s for someone else to decide, but it is how I live and how I want to live. So perhaps that is my challenge to you if you choose to accept it. Ask yourself if this was your last year upon this earth, how would you like to live it? Would you hold grudges? Would you be unkind? Would you spend your time trying to live up to anyone else’s expectations or would you live the life you thought the Divine intended you to live? Would you have a different job? Would you heal an emotional wound? Would you dare to be authentic and beautifully yourself? Go ahead. I dare you. I even double dog dare you to have the best year of being you, beautiful, messy, crazy you, and if you do, let me know how it goes. I love you all. As always, thanks for being you and have a great 2015. Happy New Year everyone!!

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One Response to “Do Better December 31st 2014 Well Here We Are”

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  1. Do Better December 31st 2014 Well Here We Are | karenbemmes aka Better Living Daily - December 31, 2014

    […] Do Better December 31st 2014 Well Here We Are. […]

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